In an academic institution, a large part of progressing through a career is having enough publications to get to the next rung. It’s a battle I was aware of when I joined, but have not been motivated enough to fight well. Maybe I’m not equipped, maybe I’m not a battler, maybe I’m just plain lazy. “Not enough publications” is a yearly ordeal I hear every June as I settle into a stagnant life in my C grade quarters and I find myself unable to remove the Asst. in my designation. This is also an easy excuse for not being allotted a car park at work. But it hasn’t impacted on the joy factor in life thankfully. Only my overall impact factor on the academic world has been, tragically, close to zilch.<\/p>\n
I’ve now started using “Not Enough Publications” as an excuse for everything to try and twist this academic disability in my favour. Here are some (possible) scenarios:<\/p>\n
1. (At work): Doctor Sir, why can’t you discharge my child. He’s already 1.5 kg and gobbling milk through that NG tube.
\nAfter 15 minutes of explaining our discharge criteria, parents were adamant.
\n“I still can’t discharge the baby dear parents”.
\n“Why doctor ji”
\n“I don’t have enough publications”
\n(After a round of hugs and tears)
\n“Doctor, we’ll stay till you say he is fit for discharge”<\/p>\n
2. At Radisson Beach Resort:
\nMe: “Could you upgrade our room sir”
\nReceptionist: “Are you a Club Member sir”
\nMe: “No sir. But I don’t have enough publications”
\nHim: “You can take the Royal Suite sir”<\/p>\n
3. Auto guy: “80 RS sir”
\nI give him a 100.
\n“Do you have enough change sir”, he asks.
\nMe: “Not enough change. Not enough publications. Keep the 100”
\nEveryone is a winner.<\/p>\n
4. “I won’t be able to help with music at church this Sunday”
\n“Why Benji”
\n“Not enough publications”<\/p>\n
5. “I’ll skip dessert”
\n“Why honey”
\n“Not enough publications”<\/p>\n
6. JJ: “Appa, could I have a new Lego set for my birthday, please?”
\nMe: “No JJ”
\n“Waaaaaaaah. But why Appa? I used manners”
\n“Appa has manners too, but not enough publications”<\/p>\n
7. “Sir you are eligible for a lifetime free Platinum credit card sir”
\nMe: “That’s ok, I’ll skip this offer. Not enough publications”
\n“Sir, then you can have our titanium card with more benefits.”<\/p>\n
8. “Benji, you don’t update your facebook status often. It’s been a loooong time”
\n“Yah machhan. Not enough publications”
\n—————-
\nPublish or Perish they told me. I know which way I’m headed. If you don’t see this diary updated in a month, say a silent prayer for me.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
In an academic institution, a large part of progressing through a career is having enough publications to get to the next rung. It’s a battle I was aware of when I joined, but have not been motivated enough to fight well. Maybe I’m not equipped, maybe I’m not a battler, maybe I’m just plain lazy. “Not enough publications” is a yearly ordeal I hear every June as I settle into a stagnant life in my C grade quarters and I find myself unable to remove the Asst. in my designation. This is also an easy excuse for not being allotted a car park at work. But it hasn’t impacted on the joy factor in life thankfully. Only my overall impact…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"cybocfi_hide_featured_image":"","spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true},"categories":[22,6,7,5],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/paWFfI-7W","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.addicted2jesus.com\/a2jdiary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/492"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.addicted2jesus.com\/a2jdiary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.addicted2jesus.com\/a2jdiary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.addicted2jesus.com\/a2jdiary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.addicted2jesus.com\/a2jdiary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=492"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/www.addicted2jesus.com\/a2jdiary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/492\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":495,"href":"http:\/\/www.addicted2jesus.com\/a2jdiary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/492\/revisions\/495"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.addicted2jesus.com\/a2jdiary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=492"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.addicted2jesus.com\/a2jdiary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=492"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.addicted2jesus.com\/a2jdiary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=492"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}